How to communicate with women
I've found that there is an art to communicating with women that few men understand. Men become complacent in maintaining active and interactive conversations only months after lingering on a woman's every word. Women, on the other hand, never forget that it was his initial interest in her every word that first gained her attention.
Communicating with women is different than communicating with men, but mostly because their interests are different. While women are satisfied just knowing the final score of the biggest game of the year, men like to know individual statistics and details. But when women want to explain every detail of a successful shopping experience, men only care about the cost.
Listening is still the key. Effective communication is not a matter of sharing interest in the same passions, but being passionate enough to care about what the other person shares. Women often complain that men stop listening. Active listening involves interaction and participation. Asking questions, repeating key points, eye contact, and even sharing opinions shows that issues important to her also matter to you.
Men interested in improving their level of communication with women should remember a few points.
1. Communicate with her as if it's a first date. Ask questions, and then listen to the answers. Be sincere in your evaluations or input, and speak to her as if you care about her feelings. A good conversation format to follow is to compliment, ask questions, listen to her responses, and then compliment again.
2. Think of a conversation with a woman like ballroom dancing. Women want a man to lead, without being demanding. Flow with the rhythm of the conversation. Maintain balance, both in objectivity and judgment. And staying centered, never leaning too far to the right or the left of her point of view. Remember, you're only there to compliment her. She's the center of attention.
3. Communicating with women takes greater patience and understanding. Not because they speak or hear things any differently than men, but because they are thorough and want a complete understanding of the subject matter. Women respond to emotional stimuli, interpreting pitch, tone, voice inflection, and even information in a different manner than most men.
There are also rules of engagement which should never be ignored throughout the communication process.
These are basic dos and don'ts that make interacting with women easier.
-Control the conversation, but not the woman. Women like for men to be in charge, but they do not like being told what to do.
-Suggest, but never imply. Women can take suggestions, but hate implications.
-Respect her opinion. Even if you disagree with her, she has the right to express what she feels.
-Compliment her. This was mentioned before, but it bears repeating. Flattery gets you everywhere.
-Tell her she's wrong. A woman is never wrong unless she's says she is.
-Initiate an argument. It's a no-win battle.
-Read her the riot act. This initiates an argument.
-Speak down to her. She's on a pedestal. You have to look up to her.
Posted by Terry Marsh@ Terry Marsh