Love, Life, and Relationships: Why Do Men Lie?

There have been times in my life when I, like most people at one time or another, have taken the path of least resistance. Not that it was my intention to lie, but at that particular moment, it allowed me to avoid conflict, avoid disappointment, or avoid having to take some form of action that I was in no mood to take at that moment. But ultimately, it is the fear of unknown consequences that mostly cause men to lie.

So, we could surmise that men lie as a form of avoidance, but it actually goes much deeper than that. Some people have perfected the art of lying to an art form. And like any acquired skill, it is usually developed at a young age. Children tell “white lies” about taking change from a mother’s purse. They “stretch the truth” about having finished homework. And they “fib” about eating cookies before dinner. But at what point do white lies, stretching the truth and fibs become full-fledged lies? In essence, lying is a form of manipulation with the objective being to achieve some type of short term gain.

Men also lie because they allow themselves to be put in compromising situations. It may be immaturity, or a sense of adventure, but even the most level headed of our species falls victim to getting caught up in the moment. Whether it's responding to attention received from an attractive woman, or going through a mid-life crisis (which seems to happen at any age), men make crucial mistakes, then lie to get out of them. Many times, we can't even explain why we did what we did.

Another big reason that men lie is because of ego. They embellish "big fish stories" to make up for shortcomings and inadequacies. And many times continue lying to create an identity larger than who they perceive themselves to be. When this happens, the thin line between fantasy and reality becomes blurred, and the story teller begins to live in a world that is half real and half made up.

Some men lie to cover up other lies, but there are those who seem to lie for the sport of it, even when they don't have to. Getting caught in a lie is not a comfortable experience. And instead of coming clean, they dig themselves deeper into a hole. They seldom look beyond the present situation to see that the facade that they're creating could become the demise of their relationship. And unfortunately, it usually does.